my initial instinct was right. somthing serious was going on. she was calling to tell me that her sweet little baby boy (about three months old) has been admitted to the hospital. they discovered that he has a serious heart condition. at this point the doctors are unsure of how he got sick. is it something genetic or viral? she mentioned that her sweet little baby may need a heart transplant, and that his chance of recovery is 30%. my heart broke when she said she was glad i was able to meet him, just in case...
i managed to remain fairly strong on the phone, but i was a mess when i hung up. i called the bf to tell him and i broke down. i can only imagine what she and her husband must be going though. i hate being this far away from her. i wish i could be there for her. i wish i could take away her pain. i wish i could tell her that everything is going to be alright. i wish i could fix that darling little boy and send him off for a normal, healthy life. my heart literally aches for them. they are experiencing every parent's worst nightmare.
i am scared. my heart is breaking. i feel helpless when i want so badly to be able to help. i don't know what to do. i want to be the best possible friend to her. i want to give her anything she needs. i want to make her baby well again. i want her to have her happy little family.
to be a mom is to walk around raw for the rest of your life. to be constantly aware of the dangers your child encounters on a regular basis, and of your powerlessness to protect them from most of it. we take it for granted when our children are healthy. we get mad at them for stupid things. we don't appreciate them. we wish they would hurry up and grow up already! we wish they would leave us the hell alone while we try and write on our blog!
life is short. sometimes it is way more short than we could have ever imagined.
i love you erin. i am praying harder than i have ever prayed before in my life. i am a million miles away but i am with you.
please God, PLEASE heal baby Abram.
9 comments:
you're so right - as soon as you have kids you become truly vulnerable.
Sending hope from down under that Abram gets better.
thanks rebecca!
so, you pick up that little bundle and everything changes, eh? your post was very real, very raw.
i'll be sending good thoughts for the little guy....wish you luck in continuing to be a supportive and strong friend.
thanks feisty, he needs all the positive thoughts he can get!
I'll be praying for him and the whole family.
I'm sure just being there for you friend even if its only by phone is a tremendous help to her.
That poor little guy...
Life really isn't fair.
casmee & wmom: thank you for your thoughts and prayers!
wm: life is most definitely not fair!
Your post made me tear up too. Abram and his family are in my thoughts too and I also wanted to say that you ARE there for your friend - she called you and you were there. How fantastic is that?
Hugs
Kate
I'm so sorry, sweetie.
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